For Whom BELL Tolls

Here in New England we were ecstatic to win the Bell Built Grant for a new flow trail on Burke Mountain in 2013. It was something the entire community of mountain bikers would enjoy. Bell has continued to award grants for trail expansions since, but for 2016 they have a new, profound focus, and it's YOU!

Oh yeah, ladies! The spotlight is on you. Bell has seemingly heard the cries, strike that, screams of the women regarding the industry and it's lack of focus on us. The industry that has exploited women for advertising purposes, published shameful marketing campaigns (Superior Bikes), and straight up ignored the existence of the female mountain biker (great way to promote your race, btw).

Finally, the Bell tolls, and hopefully the sun is setting on the controversy women have been fighting so passionately against in the cycling industry. 

"For 2016, Bell will be identifying 5 women in 5 towns to help us achieve our mission to get more women riding on dirt more often...."

Who else better to grow the women's industry, than the women themselves? Bell wants to help make that happen. Bell has stepped up to the plate with more than just a marketing campaign, but a true Put Their Money Where Their Mouth Is grassroots program.

"The Bell Joy Ride Program is designed to inspire and enable female mountain bikers with regular, structured, fun and social rides that appeal to all levels of riders. This is a space where female riders can enjoy both challenge and camaraderie in a non-race oriented environment."

Is this for real!!? I could not be more stoked about this! As a rider. As a woman. As a leader of my local mountain bike organization. As an ambassador of our sport. As someone who is constantly promoting more women on bikes! This is like the planets have aligned. 

Well, maybe. We are a little behind here on the East Coast, especially in New England. I have friends throughout the US organizing amazing women's events with amazingly supportive communities, and often realize how far ahead they are in this movement.

A short winter trip out West this past year confirmed my notion when I rode with women of various skills and time on the bike. They were growing their group rides much faster. The only variable is the amount of women's programs available, and continuing to rotate 

                                                                                   through their area during the year. 

We need more women focused programs and rides! 

We need the help!

Now, it's not that we don't have ANY women's programs or rides. We have several outstanding leaders here in New England that have been doing a great job for the past few years, but we need more.

Are you a leader? Do you want to help? 

You can apply to be one of the five Bell Joy Ride Ambassadors. Bell will be accepting application through November 1, 2015 and deciding whom will represent the Joy Ride program by December 1, 2015.

Self Medicating: A letter of Gratitude to my Dealer

I walked out of the hospital today unable to fight off tears that automatically rolled down my face, and I immediately thought of you. I need a fix. I need to escape this reality. I know you can help. I know you’ll make me feel better. I know, because you are the reason I have survived the past couple years. Every day is another struggle, another hurdle, another wall, and I have gotten to the point of self medicating through you almost every day now.

I think the world has given self medicating a bad rep. We all need a resource to keep us going. We all need a resource to help us stay strong through the challenges of life. We all need a resource to help us escape when needed. Some of us just need more doses, stronger doses. Some never find the right medication. Some don’t survive.

It’s funny and sad, in a way, when people comment with how lucky I am. I don’t think needing a daily fix is a “lucky” thing, but it does help me cope and for that I am grateful. I cannot begin to express my gratitude for all you have done. You are always there for me when I need a fix. You’re never too busy, never too tired, never unwilling or unable to supply me with the exact dose I need. Because of you, I, myself, am not in a hospital or worse. Because of you, I can escape, recharge, and make it through another day. You are my source of strength, courage, confidence, and stability.

Thank you for getting me lost, so I can reconnect and find myself. Thank you for beating me up, so I can feel my strength. Thank you for making me lose my balance, so I can find stability. Thank you for scaring me, so I can feel the courage and confidence I need to keep going and get through another day. 

To my dealer, my supplier, my drug, my bike.... Thank You!

Not Just Another Recovery Ride

By definition, a recovery ride is usually a light intensity ride following an extended effort, high intensity ride. Many racers practice this ritual to minimize the physiological effects of intense training and racing. Think of it like post exercise stretching, massages, or cool down routines. I, personally, find it speeds up the recovery time and limits the negative effects such as achy muscles.

However, for the purposes of this post, this is NOT the type of recovery ride I am referring to.

Just shy of a year ago, on a typical Tuesday night ride, I pedaled past a few ladies who were sizing up the top section of a trail we refer to as 'Rock Face'. As I passed by, I encouragingly said, "It's not as bad as it looks..."

Queen of the Mountain

Unbeknownst to me at the time, this specific section had claimed many riders, sending them over the bars if they took the wrong line. In a split second, with no warning, I went from rubber side down, to rubber side UP. It was so quick, I can only compare it to a mouse trap snapping. I claimed the QOM of OTBs and displayed what would have made for a perfect Scorpion clip on Ridiculousness if someone had been recording.

Scorpion!

The girls behind me stood in horror asking if I was okay. Crawling out from under my bike, I immediately grabbed for my teeth to feel if there were any left. Thankfully, everything seemed in order, but I turned around to have the girls confirm, as I kneeled there shaking. Then I felt my nose, it too seemed unscathed. The girls again confirmed. The only immediate visible damage was a scraped up face and a touch of blood. Not even a bloody nose.

Rock vs. Face

I was able to ride out of the woods as the swelling set in. No pain, just jittery nerves from the massive impact.

That night, I slept with an ice pack on my face, but thought it strange the next morning when there was still NO pain. None. Nada. Zip. Zilch. How could I have smacked the rock faced ground that hard and not have any pain? How could I be so bruised and swollen without pain?

I decided to go to the ER just for precautionary purposes, and on the way out noticed my tongue was black and swollen like that of the deer we used to skin and butcher in our barn when I was young. Seemed my teeth were spared by my now bruised and swollen tongue.

As for my face, it was not as fortunate. After a CAT scan, the doctor came in with the news. Multiple facial fractures and serious swelling in the sinus cavity area. They had me report immediately to a local ENT for evaluation of the swelling to determine if it was the cause of the numbness.

The ENT walked in the room and without even taking a moment to say hello or even sit down he said, "Yup, that'll need surgery."

I am not a battered woman.
I ride mountain bikes.

                             WHAT!?

He went on to explain that the impact broke the orbital and cheek bone. With the impact being so intense the nerves were immediately severed causing the absence of any pain. He also explained that I may or may not get feeling back in my face, even after surgery.

By Friday of that week, I was on an operating table having a titanium plate screwed into my face to hold the bones in place. Today, most people can not even see the scar line under my eye, but you can feel one of the screws right in the corner.

Not to be discouraged, the very next day after the surgery, I was back out on the trails. There was plenty of hesitation, plenty of shakiness, but I refused to let the mishap win.

It took me a few months to build my confidence back, but on each steep, rocky decent I gained it back piece by piece. Still, almost a year later though, I had yet to reclaim the trail that claimed me. I needed to do a recovery ride.

Just a few months shy of the one year anniversary, on another Tuesday night ride, I was ready, and I made my intentions know. I would follow another rider down, and the girls who were behind me watching that fateful night were superstitiously not allowed in that same position. I needed set the stage to reclaim the section that broke my bones, but would ultimately, not break me. Rock Face would no longer hold my confidence captive.

The entire approach I was riddled with nervousness. Climbing up, my mind was reeling with playbacks, both successes and the disastrous fail. Winding through the trail up top I repeatedly told myself, "You ride stuff worse than this all the time. Relax. Just roll through it."

                       A little self therapy and coaching always helps.

The group gathered at the top, I chose the line up, and we began the approach. I knew the correct line. I knew it was easier than many other things I ride without a second thought. I knew I had the skills. I knew I just had to breath.

I clipped in, took one deep breath and I followed the lead rider into the first section, the section that had claimed me the year prior. In an instant we were through and I exhaled as we continued on through the rest of the sections to eliminate all embedded PTSD affiliate with the trail and I.

Confidence boost. No more fear!
Lincoln Woods, RI

The sections consisted of various rollers. One spine-like roller, one off camber diagonal roller, and the last was a wedge roller that can also be dropped if one is so inclined. Each one was celebrated with another release of breath as I exhaled.

We paused for a moment, as I took a deep breath to calm my shaking  nerve riddled body. The trauma and PTSD were being released. We then continued on down the smooth section of the decent to the infamous rock garden below.

It was not just another recovery ride, it was the most important type of recovery ride. I reclaimed the final shattered piece of my confidence.

           It's your ride, own it!

So, my message to you is... If you ever have a trail take advantage of you and rob you of your confidence, take time to heal, take time to come to terms, take time to rebuild your confidence, then go back to that spot and reclaim your right to ride it without fear, without thinking, without the PTSD associated.

                 Get Out & Ride!!

One Size Fits... Athletes?

I recently bought a pair of Under Armour athletic underwear. While looking for my "size", I noticed the box said "One Size Fits All Athletes." Intrigued, I purchased them with high hopes. When I got home, I decided to give them the true fit test. I slid them on with no problem and they seemed to provide adequate coverage. These are athletic underwear, however, and I am going to be moving in all sorts of crazy ways. So I tested them out. Knee lifts. Run in place. Bend over, stand up. Squat down, stand up. In conclusion, the only workout I was going to get in these athletic underwear was a wedgie workout and a raw butt.

I am a woman. I do not starve myself. I do not follow the diet of the week routine. I am not a vegetarian nor a vegan, but I do not eat unhealthy. I eat salads on a daily basis, take vitamins, eat plenty of protein and drink plenty of water. I am, per my doctor, a healthy woman. I am a curvy figured woman.

Being a VERY active woman, I consider myself athletic. I am not a pro. I do not pay to compete against others. I do not train endless hours. My toughest competitor, my biggest critic, is myself. I enjoy being active. I enjoy challenging myself. I enjoy competing on a recreational/social level, even if it's just for bragging rights or Strava QOMs.  I am an athletic woman. I am an athlete.

So why, WHY does the industry try to impress upon us that if we are not a leggy, size 2, curveless female, we are not "fit" for their apparel?

I am a mountain biker. I also road ride, run, play basketball, hike... I wear a medium. I wear a size 8. Some days a 10. (It was a rough winter.) However, when it comes to finding clothes for biking... ugh.

I have been biking for several years and this has been a constant pattern.

First with the roadie clothes. Why are the jerseys so short? I have a longer torso and short legs. Even when I'm wearing an XL, because that is what the cycling industry considers my Medium sized body, the jerseys are too short.

Mountain biking clothes are the same. The other day I found some nice pair of Fox women's baggie shorts in a LBS, and they even had a pair of XL. OMG! (Nobody ever has the larger sizes in stock.) I go to try them on... I can't get them over my hips. In disbelief, I take them off and look at the tag again,it says XL. I hold out the pants in an attempt to grasp how an XL will not fit me, and then I see it. The rectangle shape of the pants. There is no room for hips in these things, and the legs are skinny too. What exactly does an XL mountain biker chic look like?

I commented to the owner of the LBS about my distress and he comforted my aggravation by informing me how "not alone" I am.

Here is a shout out to the athletic industry, One Size DOES NOT Fit All Athletes!